One of the most important skills you can develop is your ability to influence people. And, influencing people is tricky, because your natural tendency is to think that it is within your control. But, that isn’t the case. The decisions they make about you are theirs, not yours.

For example, if I say that I own a Prius, what conclusions do you draw about me?
You might think that I’m a tree hugging hippie and that I must be bleeping vegetarian.
Or, you might think that I’m an environmental activist, living in a way that minimizes my impact on the environment, living the ideals that we should all strive for.

But, in either case, that is your conclusion, not mine. You have no idea why I drive a Prius. You don’t know anything about what motivated me to make that decision.
So, when you and I interact, how you see me – as a tree hugging hippie or as an environmental champion will impact the interaction.
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This episode examines the filters that we bring to our interactions with others and how we can understand them in order to improve our relationships.

​Influencing others is one of the most important thing you’ll need to do over the course of your career. When you need to convince others to buy-in to your idea, you’re going to need to influence them in a way that they are receptive to. You’ll need to tailor the way you present your idea to each person in a manner that they are likely to hear it.
 
I’m not suggesting you lie about anything. I’m suggesting that, everyone has different personality traits that drive their preferences. Some people are task oriented and others people oriented. Some people are analytical, and others go with their instincts. Your job is to understand their preferences and tailor your message to those preferences. You are providing the same information, just in a format that the other person is more likely to accept.